Parenting and Child Care Guides

Guides for parents to help your child grow in a good environment



During Pregnancy
  Parenting
  Take Care Of Yourself
  Important Nutrients
  Food To Avoid
  Sport exercise and sex
  Medicines To Avoid
  Diabetes During Pregnancy - A Curse For The Unborn And The Mother
  Other Things To Do

Baby Time
  What are you Feeding your Child's Emotional Appetite?
  Ideas And Suggestions On Baby Gifts
  Baby's First Valentine's Day
  How To Feed Your Infant



About Nursery
  The Real Dangers Of The Nursery
  Selecting The Right Air Cleaner For Your Baby's Nursery

Parenting
  Developing your Child's Appreciation of the Natural World
  The Importance of Finding the Good in Your Child
  When your Baby Sleeps-baby Care
  How to Deal With Fears in Children?
  Keeping Your Kids Active
  Should you Limit Your Kids Time Playing Video Games?
  10 Guidelines For Parents Of Kids Playing Video Games
  Children are the Products of Either Good or Bad Parenting
  Parenting is a Big Responsibility
  How to Say No When Your Kid Wants a Toy
  Avoiding Your Child to be Addicted to TV
  The Blame Game
  7 Strategies To Protect Your Kids From Media Anxiety
  5 Things You Must Do To Protect Your Kids From School Violence
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Thursday, April 17, 2008
Family Vacations - What If? - Preparing for the Unexpected
Excitement is at an all time high because the announcement has been made.The family is going on vacation to a theme park. Children become more hyper then if they had eaten 10 pounds of sugar. Parents become stressed as they book flights, reserve hotels and plan for traveling. So much exhilaration and exhaustion and you haven't even left yet. Now is the time to plan for the "What If".

Theme parks offer so many fun and exciting thing for a family vacation. And as many parents can confirm, children become super hyper during these trips. With so many exhilarating things to see and do in theme parks, it only takes a moment for children to become separated from their parents. We all hope that it doesn't happen, but the key is to prepare for it ahead of time just in case."

Here are some tips for parents:

* Map out the park: Many theme parks have downloadable park maps that you can review as a family and become familiar with the layout before you go. You could also identify designated relocation points on the maps if you become separated.

* Plan your wardrobe: Consider purchasing matching shirts that all family members will wear during the trip. If you become separated it will be easier to recognize each other if your all dress similarly.

* Know what to do if it happens: Instruct your child to find the closest security guard or working employee of the park. Instruct them not to ask other visitors of the park for help. While many people may be willing to help, your child should only seek the help from a trusted adult who works at the theme park.

* Time for that tantrum: If someone tries to abduct your children, tell them to scream out as loud as they can, "Your not my Mommy/Daddy!!! HELP!" Drop to the ground kicking and screaming, and to throw the biggest tantrum ever.

* ID cards for the Children: Make sure your children have up to date ID cards that contain a current phone, statistical information, and family travel contact information.

While these tips can not prevent a separation from happening on your next vacation, your family will be much better prepared to deal with the situation and will be quickly reunited so that you can enjoy the rest of your vacation experience.

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posted by Khate @ 9:01 AM   0 comments
# 10 Parenting Tips To Help Your Kids Perform Better in Life

Want your children to perform better in life and enjoy more success?

Here are ten tips that will help you to motivate your children to perform better...

1. Shower praise and encouragement on them. This is a great way to inspire your children to perform better.

2. Provide safe and supportive environment to your children. Laugh and Play with them. Do things together. Talk with them. Let them express their opinion and feelings.

3. Allow your children to explore and build their natural abilities and interest. For example, if your son is interested in painting, let him paint. Encourage him to participate in painting competitions.

4. Appreciate and praise whatever abilities and qualities your children have. Never compare your children with others and criticize them.

5. Don't just ask about tests and grades. Frequently ask your children what new things they are learning in school. What fun they had. This helps to create a positive impression in your children's mind that school is also about learning and fun, not just exams.

6. Celebrate your children's every achievement, even if it's small. Hang your children's craftwork or schoolwork on a wall or refrigerator.

7. Talk with your children regularly to make sure they are not feeling overwhelmed with study work, extracurricular activities and other work. If they are, help them prioritize their work. Ask them to do the most important work first and leave the less important work to the last.

8. Try to remove your children's fear and weaknesses. The best way to do it is to encourage your children to focus on their strength and good qualities.

9. Make sure your children eat healthy, nutritious food. Also, never allow your children to go to school without a good breakfast in the morning. As research shows that breakfast is the most important meal of the day and influences mental performance.

10. Encourage your children to exercise for 30 minutes a day. This keeps the body fit and healthy. Also, make sure your children sleep for at least 7 or 8 hours. Good sleep provides adequate rest to brain which helps to learn better and remember more.

All the above tips are simple. If you use them regularly, you will see immense improvement in your children's confidence and success.

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posted by Khate @ 9:00 AM   0 comments
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
Reasons Babies Cry
Crying became a normal event in baby’s life. The first thing a baby does when coming out the womb is to cry. By doing so, the baby takes in air into his or her lungs. If the baby does not cry, stroking or pinching slightly the buttock make him or her cry. From here onwards, crying will be a daily routine and sometimes can upset parents and other family members.

Babies cannot tell their needs or trouble they are having. The only way to show is by crying, feet kicking, hand waving and head turning. But the best way to get attentions is still crying. Crying usually can be sooth by carrying the baby, feeding and gentle rocking. But if the baby continues to cry excessively, the baby is showing signs of distress and maybe life threatening reasons, and should be taken seriously.

The most common reasons baby cries is hunger. A hungry baby will cry to get milk. The second most common is wetting. When the baby wets, he feels discomfort and therefore cry so that someone can help clean and make him dry again. Baby also cries when they feel lonely and need some company. They need to be hug and touched at all time, to be kept warm. Baby if dressed up in tight clothes will irritate him and end up crying. Always dress the baby in airy and non skin irritating material.

Babies also cry when they feel tired and uncomfortable in the surrounding. Extreme heat or cold make babies restless. A room with proper ventilation is conducive for babies. Some babies are afraid or dark rooms. Strong lighting is also not suitable for babies. If everything is intact with the baby’s room but the child still cries, check for mosquitoes. Babies are easy target for mosquitoes.

A child may cry due to health reasons. When his nasal is block and he can’t breathe easily, he needs some attention. Other health factors are such as phlegm in throat, general aching, fever, nappy rash, food allergic and teething. Earache is common in wet climate. The infections may spread from throat. Earache becomes worse at night and the baby become restless.

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posted by Khate @ 12:40 AM   0 comments
Teaching About Language Through Reading Aloud
When dads read aloud to them, children are learning many different things. They are learning about the world, they are learning to love books and reading, and they are learning about language. This learning about language occurs mainly as children hear, see and understand the language as it is used. This is a kind of subconscious learning that takes place naturally. Dads do not need to do anything special. They just have a good time on the read aloud journey that we and the children have embarked on.

No need to push the teaching, it happens naturally

However, in addition to this subconscious, natural language learning that goes on during reading aloud, dads can also promote conscious language learning by calling children's attention to specific language features in the book or whatever that they are reading aloud. Before explaining some ways to do this teaching, let us emphasize caution. Do not overdo the teaching. Keep reading aloud enjoyable. Please.

What to teach

What dads teach will depend on the reading level of the children they are reading to. Also, in addition to their ideas about language points to raise, dads should respond to children’s questions about language. Here are some language features they can teach while reading aloud:

* Individual letters, spelling and phonics

* If the book has rhymes, dads can talk about rhyming and encourage children to make up more rhymes of their own

* Punctuation, such as after they have read aloud a question, dads can talk about question marks and why they are used instead of full stops

* The parts of a book, for example, stories normally begin with a setting that tells readers about who is involved and where and when the story takes place, followed by some kind of conflict that confronts the main character(s), and finally a resolution of some kind to the conflict

* Grammar, for example, noticing why past tense is used in some places while present tense is used in other places in the book or in other book

* Vocabulary, for example, in Hazel's Puppy, a page at the end of the book lists six words and definitions which dads could highlight while reading.

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posted by Khate @ 12:39 AM   0 comments
Saturday, April 12, 2008
Summer’s Coming! 5 Helpful Tips for Parents
Many parents both love and hate the thought of summer vacation. On the one hand, you’re ready to be done with the homework, backpacks full of papers, seemingly endless fundraisers, and getting the kids up and out the door to catch the bus every morning. Summer holds the possibility of a slower pace, fun times together as a family, and the kids being able to wrestle each other outside instead of in the family room! But then there’s the other side of the summer vacation coin: refereeing the kids’ fights (also know as “too much togetherness syndrome”), blocking out the whines of “but there’s nothing to dooooo,” shuttling kids around from one activity to the next, and discovering that there is only so much time you can be around your children before you start to lose your mind. It seems every season has its pluses and minuses!

A little summer pre-planning can go a long way in maximizing summer benefits for any family—especially families living with autism or other disabilities. Here are 5 helpful tips for thinking about and planning your summer months.

1. Plan ahead! The key is not to let summer sneak up on you, and overwhelm you in the process. You know summer’s coming, so commit to making it a great experience for everyone involved instead of a stress-fest for your family. Begin looking into options in your area such as camps, community events, local attractions, parks, and other options that may be available. There are many things that are free or low cost if you take the time to look for them. Just exploring the variety of parks and playgrounds in your area can make for great inexpensive fun. Most larger communities have recreation departments that offer summer activities ranging from sports to art to science.

2. Ensure adequate support for your child. Make sure whatever activities you choose for your child include adequate support for him/her to have a successful experience. There can be a tendency to think that because summer activities don’t involve “academics,” children with autism and other disabilities won’t need as much support. The reality is that these kids need support to navigate the social complexities and expectations of seasonal environments such as camp, vacation Bible school, local recreation events, etc. Supports vary according to the needs of each child, but it is best to determine potential needs and accommodations ahead of time to ensure a positive and productive experience for your child, and less worry for you.

3. Figure out a schedule that is workable for everyone involved. Sometimes in the quest to make sure everyone has things to do, we end up turning ourselves into crazed taxi drivers all summer long. Determine how much time you want to be at home versus other places; and don’t go crazy planning something every minute. As much as kids may think they need to be doing something 24-7, there is great benefit to them having some downtime as well. Don’t plan so much in your summer schedule that there isn’t free time and relaxation.

4. ALL kids need a break from the hectic schedule of the school year! Some parents of children with autism or other disabilities feel that they need to make every moment therapeutic, or have their child involved in some kind of activity or program each day. I have met many families over the years who become stressed at the thought of their child not being in school for the summer. Some of the BEST learning for kids takes place outside the walls of the classroom. You may have been conditioned to believe that what your child needs only happens in a school building, or that you can’t possibly provide the same benefits outside a school setting. Nothing could be further from the truth! Allow your child with autism to experience the summer just like other kids—and watch them blossom in the process.

5. Make time for yourself. All parents need breaks and time to themselves throughout the summer. The previous tips will help accomplish reduced stress for parents by planning ahead for structured activities outside the home, and developing a workable time schedule for those things to happen. Parents also need to allow some time to do things you want/need to do, instead of feeling like you have to entertain your kids all day. Determining a workable schedule that includes time at home together and time doing other activities will help everyone stay sane—most importantly you!

Summer can be a great time for kids, parents, and families as a whole. A little time spent in planning can make the difference between a successful, rejuvenating summer, and one that leaves you burnt out and longing for September. Look for a future article covering the kinds of questions you should ask when considering summer programs and activities for your child.

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posted by Khate @ 7:46 AM   0 comments
Commercial Day Care Center Vs. Someone's Home
he first thing to keep in mind is that you have the right to ask as many questions as you would like until you are comfortable leaving your child in any day care situation.
Three major categories that should be involved in making this decision are:

1. Policies on discipline, caring for sick children and other important issues.

2. Staff training in areas such as basic first aid, child development and identification of abused children.

3. Building and playground safety such as smoke alarms, electrical outlets and sharp corners.

In general I am comforted by the fact that there seem to be many more eyes on a commercial facility. I feel that they are held to higher standards. These standards include building maintenance, screening of employees, and training of employees. Also, the facilities themselves tend to be cleaner and more structured. They tend to focus on learning tools and toys. For instance a commercial day care center typically has multiple computer stations and a variety of educational computer software and games.

The argument of those who prefer daycare facilities run from someone’s home tend to focus on the comfort of the child being in a “homey” atmosphere. I feel there will inevitably be more distractions when the key person running the facility is in their own home. Phone calls, deliveries, neighbors and being concerned about the maintenance of the home on a personal level are all situations that could take time and attention away from the care of your child.

None the less, opinions will vary among parents and guardians. The very most important thing you can do regardless of whether you choose a commercial day care center or someone’s home is to make an informed decision that you feel comfortable with. Please use the categories above and make a list of your questions so that you are prepared when visiting potential day care providers. Hint: Other parents who have their children at the facility are a great source of information!

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posted by Khate @ 7:45 AM   0 comments
Children Reading Aloud With Us
As children's reading ability improves, they may want to read aloud with us, starting off with just saying a word or two that they recognize. Even children who cannot read at all can sometimes read along, either because you have read them the book so many times that they have memorized many of the sentences or because in a predictable book, certain phrases or sentences are repeated many times.

With picture books, another way to involve children in reading along is to use the pictures. For example, the sentence "Look at those puppets" appears accompanied by pictures of hand puppets in the book My Speech & Drama Class. Instead of reading the entire sentence, we can read only, "Look at those _______" and encourage children to use the drawings to fill in "puppets". Or, children can just name what they see in the pictures.

Later, children can use picture books to create their own stories. If those stories are different from what is in the book – a little or a lot different – that is okay. Also, when we are not reading to them, children may take books and 'read' them on their own, without us around. This reading play is an early stage in developing a silent reading habit. As children's reading ability improves, they can read the words they know and leave the other words to us.

When George's niece Crystal learned how to read, she still wanted him to read to her, and refused his invitations to take turns reading aloud, even when they were reading a book that was within her ability range. Instead, she read along silently as George read aloud, quickly pointing out any errors he made. However, Crystal's Elementary 1 teacher reported seeing Crystal reading aloud to her classmates!

Older children may enjoy round-robin reading aloud. For example, when one of George's nephews, Hank, was 9-years-old, they would take turns reading from books that Hank choose. The read aloud fiesta became multi-generational when Hank's grandmother joined in.

You can start to read to your kids at ANY age. It's fun for the kids and dad. It really is a dad duty!

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posted by Khate @ 7:44 AM   0 comments
Wednesday, April 9, 2008
From Homework Hell to Homework Heaven
We’ve all been there ….. half an hour later he’s still sitting at the table, having done nothing but, well, probably day-dreaming, or, after one look at the task set, flies into a “I can’t do this” rage. The homework scenario seems to follow a regular pattern, which can be time-consuming, frustrating and tiring for all concerned, to the point that some parents dread it (not to mention their child), and, quite different from the ‘perfect parent’ who has his child completing homework straight after school, finds it convenient to put it off for as long as possible to avoid the conflict. No child or his parents want homework to be a daily torturous necessity, so how can we break out of the old habitual homework scenario and break into a new empowering and positive experience?

1. First and foremost, your child needs to know that you support him in a positive and powerful way. Whatever his mood or reaction to the task set, you, as parent, must remain calm and focussed in order to best help him to approach and complete the task. Two people getting hot under the collar will not help, and there may be times when it is useful to walk away from the situation for a while to cool down.

2. Make sure your child has a quiet, well-lit place to do homework, and that he has all the materials such as paper, pens, ruler etc. Avoid places where there is noise and distraction, where people may be coming and going, and keep the TV turned off.

3. Set a time for doing homework that is suitable for both your child and yourself. This needs to be a time when you know you will not be interrupted and that you can devote your full attention to helping your child. Ideally this must not be a time when you know you will be itching to get something else done, or planning the night’s dinner in your head – you may not have the resources for patience and concentration. Some children cannot come home and straight away do their homework. They need to chill out after a day at school. Likewise, don’t leave homework till near to bedtime as tiredness will not help. Find a mutual time that you both agree on.

4. If your child is having a complete mental block with a homework task, try to find what that block is so you can help him overcome it.
(i) Sometimes it is good to find out what lessons your child likes best at school, and why. There may be some way in which that subject is taught that he finds more interesting and fun. You can then use that strategy in your own way when helping with homework.
(ii) Many children find it very difficult to learn through books and find it even harder to express themselves through pen and paper. Your child may be excellent at recalling information through speaking, but not through writing. You can help your child when you know this might be a block to his learning and approach to homework. If, for example, your child has an essay or story to write, but finds it difficult to express himself through writing, you could get him to dictate the story to you, with you recording it for him to copy into his school book afterwards.
(iii) Humour works every time. Whilst it is good to be committed to getting homework done, it is not good to be attached to the outcome. What’s important is that your child focuses, is productive, and enjoys the process, rather than a pressure to be perfect. Don’t take it too seriously. Be funny and do whatever you can to make the subject interesting and enjoyable for your child.

5. If you feel you are not progressing with a piece of homework, and however much you help, your child cannot grasp it, then leave it, don’t push him, but make sure his teacher is aware that he needs extra help. Do not do his homework for him, no matter how tempting. This will not help. His teacher can help only if he/she knows help is needed and is getting realistic feedback as to what your child is capable of. Good communication and a good relationship with his teacher is a primary way to helping your child at school.

6. If homework is meant to be done by your child alone, stay away. Too much parent involvement can prevent the teacher from getting a feel for how much of the subject your child has understood. Homework is also a great way for kids to develop independent, lifelong learning skills, and to understand that they, and only they, are responsible for their life’s achievements.

7. If your child has been successful in homework completion and is working hard, celebrate that success with a special event (e.g., pizza, a walk, a trip to the park) to reinforce the positive effort.
A parent’s positive, calm and supportive attitude to homework goes a long way to helping your child to approach homework in a powerful way. Setting a good example of focus not only helps with the particular task in hand, but helps your child to learn and develop skills that are valuable in all of life’s situations. Not only this, believe it or not, through your support with homework you can build a closer, more loving and respectful relationship with your child.

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posted by Khate @ 9:16 PM   0 comments
Tuesday, April 8, 2008
Binky Free: How to Break the Pacifier Habit
As with most of our children’s ‘milestones’, sometimes the hardest habit to break is for your child to give up their pacifier. Many children outgrow the pacifier on their own while others may need a little encouragement. So how can you break your child’s binky habit? In some circumstances, your child will tell you when he or she is ready to let go. My son for instance, was 8 months old when he no longer needed the pacifier to soothe him. Signs that your child is ready to break free of the pacifier habit included needing to use the pacifier less, sometimes they will forget where they put it or they will turn their head away to communicate that they are not interested in the pacifier.

Here are some creative ways that some mothers have used to break their children’s pacifier habit. For example one woman decided at the age of 2 for her son to ban the pacifier cold turkey. She explained that at the age of 2 binkies are not for big boys. If the binkie fell on the floor or got dirty, she explained she was throwing it out and it would not be replaced. During the binky transition, she offered more hugs and had him turn his comfort to his stuffed animals instead of being dependent on the pacifier. By the time the pacifier became so ratty that it was unusable, she had her son throw it away and explained there will be no more binkies in the house. Although this tactic may work for some moms others find it more difficult for their children to break the habit. Other moms keep the pacifier in their baby memories box with their other saved baby items so their children know it is still there. Another way to break the binky habit is to make the pacifier ‘less desirable’.

Often switching brands of pacifiers can make a real difference. One day while out at a family outing, Denise realized that she had forgotten her sons pacifier at home. After making an emergency trip to the store she realized that she had purchased a different brand. Her son, Brayden could tell the difference, he pushed it aside and he no longer wanted it. Other parents use more creative tactics then others. You will eventually find your own method and you too can break your child’s pacifier habit.

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posted by Khate @ 11:18 PM   0 comments
How to Handle Your Child’s Temper Tantrums
How many times have you been shopping in a grocery aisle and you have winessed an out of control child having a temper tantrum, not limited to yelling, throwing objects or crying. It is more than likely you thought to yourself, "If that was my child, I would ______". Fast forward three years, now here you are with your own child or perhaps children and are faced with these same situations as you may have once witnessed.

Unfortunately, temper tantrums are a normal part of life amongst children of an early age from preschoolers to toddlers. Almost all children will have a tantrum occasionally. The good news is that if handled appropriately most children will outgrow this stage within a couple of years.

As a parent you are ultimately the one who is responsible for your child’s behavior. Here are some tips on handling and preventing tantrums in your child.

Before planning a shopping outing you will want to make sure that your child is not over-tired. If your child is cranky you may suggest a nap for some quiet time, read a book or play soothing music. How you talk to your child can also have an impact on her tantrums. For example asking her to do something instead of a direct order can sometimes have a reverse effect on the outcome of the situation. For example, when asking your daughter to do something, you will want to try to ask her nicely first. Suggest this “Hannah, Mommy needs some help picking up your clothes” will usually have a different effect then “I asked you before to get in here and pick up your mess!” Stay consistent in your rules, if she acts out and you give in then this gives her leeway for her to do the same routine again, by being more consistent and less lenient your child will learn that tantrums just do not work. While sometimes hard, do not give in to bribery.

Think to yourself, does she really deserve a candy bar for going to bed on time or for picking up her clothes? Bribery is only encouraging negative behavior in the long run. If your child is beyond consolable often sending him to his room for some quiet time is the best solution. By yelling at your child to be quiet will only make him upset more. Many times a child will have a tantrum to get your attention. If you haven’t given her much ‘mommy or daddy time’ she may be trying to tell you something by acting out in a tantrum. Once she has settled down, spend some time with her, read a book together, go for a walk in the park. If your child is beyond consolable and you are in a public place head for the nearest restroom and try to calm her down or take her to the nearest food court and get a cup of water to soothe her. Talk calmly to her, often raising your voice and yelling will only result in a negative reaction and will tend to prolong the tantrum.

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posted by Khate @ 11:17 PM   0 comments
Sunday, April 6, 2008
Help Your Child Learn to Read
Parents can do quite a bit to help their child learn to read. In fact, children start learning about language and reading in their infancy, long before they ever set foot in a school. Children are helped on their language learning journey when their parents structure their daily routine and share the learning experience.

Read aloud daily. The most important and beneficial activity a parent can do is to read aloud to their child daily from day one. Reading aloud helps the child in many different ways. They will learn general concepts of print (reading progresses from left to right, top to bottom, the marks on the page have meaning, and much more). They will also learn what reading provides: insight into other worlds, fun, and practical information. The best part for the child is the shared time with an adult. They learn to love reading and enjoying reading does more to help your child become a good reader than anything else.

Have your child read to you. Choose books which are easy for your child to read so they will feel successful and develop confidence in their reading ability.

Talk about books. Ask your child what they liked about the story or characters in the story. Did they enjoy the pictures? How did the pictures help tell the story? Share stories of a similar event in your life or the life of your child. Talking about books helps a child connect with reading and remember what they have read.

Write notes to your child. Include a short note in your child’s lunch box, on the refrigerator, or their bedroom door. “I love you” or “Enjoy your field trip!” go a long way in motivating your child to read. Parents are the most powerful influence in a child’s life and your child will want to be able to connect with you.

Go easy on correction. Remember your prime purpose is to help your child be successful. This means you need to build confidence as well as skill. Instead of asking the child to sound out a word each time they struggle, you can use the following strategies to make reading a pleasant experience they will want to repeat.

*Ask what word would make sense at this point in the story.

*Tell the child the word.

*If the child reads the word correctly at another point in the story, gently point out the word where they had trouble and examine the word with your child looking for the similarities.


Read everything. Encourage your child to read every word they see—road signs, cereal boxes, messages on TV, newspapers, magazines, addresses, the phone book, and menus. Words are all around us and being able to decipher them is a wonderful way of understanding more about the world in which we live.

Parents can help their child to read successfully by practicing the tips in this article.

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posted by Khate @ 9:42 AM   0 comments
Parents: Warn Your Teens About the Dangers of Using Social Networking Websites
Online social networking websites? What are they? If you are not an internet user yourself, you may be completely unaware of social networking websites, what they are, and how they operate. The first step in protecting your teen is to famialrize yourself with them. Social networking websites are known as online communities that aim to connect internet users with each other. Unfortunately, these social networks have become the stomping grounds for many online predators and who are they after? Teenagers and chances are your teen may be one of them.

When it comes to protecting your child, your first thought may be to prohibit the use of online networking websites. Of course, you can do this if you want to. You are the parent, you can do anything that you want; however, there is really no need to. Despite the fact that danger exists, social networking sites are relatively safe, even for teenagers. However, to be safe and stay safe, your teenager needs to know what to avoid and who to be on the lookout for. Essentially, this means that they best way to protect your child from online predators is to educate them on the danger that is out there.

One of the first things that you may want to discuss with your child is who they are talking with online. Although they may not want to give you an answer, you need to emphasize the importance of knowing who they are talking to. Since social networks work to connect individuals who do not physically know each other it may seem impossible, but it can be done. Your child should fully read and try to understand the content of their friend’s online profiles. This will enable them to watch out for inconsistent stories or any inaccurate information. Tell your teen that if they learn that someone is being untruthful they need to end the conversation right away.

In addition to who your teen is taking to, it is also important to learn what they are talking about. As with who they are talking to, your teenager may not want to give you a straight answer. Even if you are unable to get an answer out of them it is important to let them know what is appropriate and what is not. Be sure they know that it is best to completely avoid individuals who like to speak of sex, drugs, and other illegal activities. Although they may enjoy having a number of online friends, there are plenty of other individuals, especially teenagers, who would more than willing to have pleasant and harmless conversations with them.

Perhaps, the most important thing to discuss with your teenager about social networking sites is arranging physical meetings. Let them know that these meeting are unacceptable. There have been numerous reports, over the past few years, of teenagers being lured away from their home in hopes of meeting a new friend, who they thought was their age. Unfortunately, many of these online friends turn out to be older and, in many cases, sexual predators. In the event that your teenager wants to meet an online friend and you feel that they would with or without your permission, you may want to offer to go with them. Of course, it is advised that you use caution and all meet in a public place.

By keeping the above mentioned points in mind, your child should still be able to use social network sites, but use them safely. In addition to the above mentioned safety concerns and precautionary measures, you may have your own. Whether you do or not, it is important that you keep your child aware of the dangers that lurk online, awareness is the key.

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posted by Khate @ 9:42 AM   0 comments
Parents Told to Let Kids Play With Paedophiles - What Next Give Them Guns
Were your days of growing up far happier than that of these times? A recent statement from Ed Balls, said the "vast majority of children feel happy and safe". He also said "Childhood is better than it's ever been. It's not toxic, "most" young people are doing better at school than they were, "most" young people are accessing new technologies, making friends... "most" trends are positive."

In debated breath I ask, how many is "most" The world is a big place or had you not noticed Ed? Yes there were times we slept four maybe five to a bed with coats for covers, there were the times we bared freezing conditions to empty the pee pot, and not to mention eating left overs fried up in the pan from the day before. Those were happy days I recall, bedtime laughter with brothers and sisters, no pee pot spillage on route to the communal toilet located as to what would seem a million miles away, and the left over spuds and cabbage welcomed by empty bellies that needed filling. Yesterday's childhood sure beats eating junk food, having an en-suite bathroom and designer beds with only miserable thoughts for company as to what tomorrow will bring.

Ed Balls rejected the idea that previous generations had better childhoods. Fair enough men worked their fingers to the bone down mines and kids too; however no harm done, in fact it made them more of a man, a man respected for providing for their families. You say "most," if talking in numbers, then how many kids in today's society are happy to see their role models drink the dole money in the pub, or see the parents dealing drugs, or worse still taking them (not all.) In the years gone by, we did live under threat from catching the plague and fear did prevail at the mention of Jack the Rippers name, but this does not come nowhere in comparison to the danger of being abducted by a paedophile ring, brutally murdered, mugged for your cell phone, pimped for pleasure blown up by terrorists, and having your hair pulled out by school bullies or worse still sadistically beaten by those who gave you life. Tell me Ed Balls how you compare living under the threat of disease (plague) to that of being shot for fun.

Obviously no homework has been done because a government report shows that there has been an increase in reports of bullying and emotional problems.

Morning TV announced the government was donating 25 million pounds towards children's play activities because - we as parent are over protective. The kids need to get back on the streets they say. A decrease in child abductions over the past year has the government tell us parents to give our children back their freedom. Did it never occur that the decrease in child abductions maybe due to parents keeping their children under wraps? I am all for teaching my kids on how to have a happy childhood and keep safe in the way I feel fit and if that means protecting them till our streets are safe to play then so be it. Unicef stated earlier this year that the United Kingdom was listed bottom of the league in terms of children's quality of life in industrialised countries.

Mr Ed Balls rejected such a view - saying that although there were "many" examples of problems affecting the young, such as under-age drinking or mental health problems, the big picture being overlooked was that "most" children had secure and happy lives. Contradiction of his report with under-age drinking or mental health problems highlights that our children may not be quite so happy. He also highlighted under-age drinking as an area in which an overall improvement is set against a more polarised, acute problem among a minority. Using a survey of 110,000 pupils, it says that 93% of children "felt happy about life at the "moment".

What is it with you and the Ms - Most – Many - Moment, these are all indecisive assumptions brought to the fore. Conclusive comments to his report were that anxieties in children stemmed from exam problems. Obesity was mentioned as a continuing concern and that many children felt unsafe on public transport. Does this tell us our kids are happy? Untill our streets are safe then any mum will do what comes naturally and that is to protect their young.

Ed will you please review your opinion on what you believe is a happier environment because I am afraid to say some would think you are talking a whole load of b….s.

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posted by Khate @ 9:39 AM   0 comments
Friday, April 4, 2008
5 Tips To Help Kids Clean Their Room
Pare down. Go through the things in your child's room and help them let go of things they have outgrown or no longer use. It can be overwhelming to find a pair of shorts from a drawer stuffed so full that it can barely close.

Give things a home. Go through your child's toys and determine which ones they still play with. Sort the "keep" toys into categories and find containers that are the correct size to hold them. Label the containers. Pictures work well for kids who cannot read. Make sure the containers are easy to get in and out of or those things are not likely to get put away.

Use a miscellaneous basket. What do you do with all of those McDonald's toys and trinkets from birthday parties? I have a miscellaneous basket in each of my kids' rooms. I go through them periodically and donate some things to the treasure box at school.

Give your child's toys a limit. When this container is full of legos or Barbies, then we have too many and will need to let go of some. This teaches boundaries of personal possessions.

Purge regularly. Children's needs and interests change quickly when they are a young age. You may need to go through their toys with them on a semi-yearly to yearly basis and ask them "I noticed you don't seem to be playing with these any longer. Could we donate these and use this container to store _______?" Just before their birthday or Christmas are especially good times to do this.

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posted by Khate @ 6:48 AM   0 comments
Tips For Helping Kids Learn Independence
For a mom with young children, having an extra set of hands or several extra sets seems not only helpful but critical! Do you wish your kids could do more tasks independently? Here are some tips to making this wish a reality.

Make it tangible. Use a list or "Morning cards" (cards with printed pictures of tasks to be done) so your child knows step by step what tasks need to be accomplished in the morning. If you are interested in purchasing "Morning cards", you can purchase them from me for $10. Contact Susan@perfectlyplaced.org.

Keep it low. Place plastic cups and bowls in a place where your child can reach so they can help themselves to drinks and make their own breakfast. It may sound unconventional, but consider using a drawer. Be sure the cereal is also on a low shelf in the pantry.

Simplify. Hang a sweater hanger in your child's closet. Place a folded uniform or school clothes in each slot (some sweater hangers even come with the days of the week labeled on them). Kids can easily get dressed and match successfully on their own in the morning.

It must be easy. Hanging kids clothes in the closet or using drawer dividers, makes things easier to find and put away. If you use hangers, make sure the rod is low enough for your child to reach. Double rods are inexpensive to purchase online.

Designate an area. Have a spot for kids to hang their backpacks after school. Choosing a place close to the door increases the likelihood that it will get used. Use labels for each child's hook.

Put the snacks together. Have a drawer or basket labeled "snacks" in the pantry. Place individual size portions of mom approved snacks inside. Give kids a limit of how many snacks are allowed per day. Let them pick them out themselves.

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posted by Khate @ 6:47 AM   0 comments
How to Avoid the Top 5 Mistakes Made by Parents with Adult Children Living at Home
Whether they've never left the nest or, like so many in the "boomerang generation, they're returning home after some time away, you're likely struggling to find ways to make the relationship with your adult children living at home work. The good news is, grown-up kids can live successfully at home - but only if you avoid some critical mistakes right from the start (or correct them right away!).

1. Encouraging rebellion by taking up parenting right where you left off

It may be hard to remember sometimes, but adult children living at home are still adults. A sure way to set yourself up for conflict is to over-parent them.

Adults who are over-parented and over-supervised will rebel as quickly as teenagers, so you need to develop some strategies to establish a new adult-to-adult relationship - quick!

2. Stealing your child's independence by giving them a "free ride"

It can be very tempting to try to help your "boomerang" kids by covering all of their living expenses - especially if they've returned home after a personal crisis like losing a job or the end of a relationship.

But why should they ever learn to take care of themselves when you're all too eager to do it for them? Even a short-term stay should require your "boomerang" kids to contribute to household expenses and chores. The best way to set these expectations clearly is by working out a household budget, so everyone is on the same page in terms of the extra costs your adult child is causing at home.

3. Assuming that since you're all grown-ups, there's no need for rules

If you think you don't need ground rules for your adult children living at home, consider how you'd feel about them smoking, drinking, or using drugs in your home - or even bringing a lover to stay overnight.

As strange as it may sound, experts agree that the best way to discuss - and stick to - these household rules is to draft up a customized contract between you and your "boomerang" kids.

4. Compromising your own financial situation to support your adult child

With adult children living at home, you'll be using more heat, hot water, and electricity. You'll need to buy more groceries. In fact, all your household expenses will increase. But no matter what you do, do not put your own financial future on the line to support your adult child. You do neither yourself nor your children any good by creating extra debt or obligations for yourself.

If you don't know where the money to make the situation work will come from, you need to think long and hard about whether you can help your adult child by having them live at your home.

5. Assuming they will leave when the time is right

The best way to ensure your "boomerang" kids leave within a reasonable timeframe is to establish a clear timeline for their stay and milestones to help them reach independence.

Most adult children living at home don't plan to stay forever. But if they don't have any clear idea of when they need to leave - or how they'll work towards being able to do so, they may end up stuck.

By establishing a timeline with clear milestones, you can empower your adult child to leave the nest. If you don't create a timeline, they may end up calling your house "home" for much longer than you - or even they - had planned.

Final Thoughts

Having adult children living at home can be extremely challenging for everyone involved. But there are some simple ways to make the situation easier for everyone, and avoiding these 5 dangerous mistakes is a key step.

Remember that a successful relationship with your adult child really boils down to establishing good ground rules and managing expectations. One of the best ways to do that is to create a contract that everyone in the home will stick to.

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posted by Khate @ 6:46 AM   0 comments
What Happens When You Just Don't Feel Like Being A Parent Some Days?
I had all the answers. I was well into my thirties when my first child was born and had been working with children, studying about childrearing practices, had many hours of babysitting behind me, and was more than ready to be a parent. When my first child was born I was instantly a mother of three. My husband's twin eight year old sons lived with us. As much as I embraced my role of mother and knew this is what I wanted, some days I just wanted to scream "I don't want to be a parent today!!"

Parenting is a demanding and all encompassing job. It is an around the clock job. There is little recognition or status attached to it. You're constantly having to think of the needs of others and the older your children get, you find yourself having to negotiate and problem solve almost daily. It can be draining. You're also asked to listen to things that are mundane and boring but nevertheless important to your child.

What do you do on those days you'd rather be sitting on the beach with a margarita in your hand than going over a spelling list for the tenth time, or listening to a child who can't seem to stop whining or reading a story you've already read fifty times? You allow yourself to feel what you feel. You're human and all of us feel that way sometimes. It definitely doesn't mean you're not meant to be a parent or that you're a bad parent.

We owe it to our children to be aware of our true feelings and acknowledge them. If you find yourself frequently thinking that you don't feel like being a parent, it's probably time to schedule an adult oriented activity with your partner or friends. Don't be afraid to say out loud how you're feeling. Chances are if you're speaking with another parent, they've often felt the same way and are relieved someone else feels the same. You don't want to tell your child that you don't feel like being a parent but you can say something like: "Mommy just feels like a rest today" or "I need a time out right now."

Children are a blessing and those of us who are parents know that. We can't imagine life without them. We often didn't know what love was until we had children. It doesn't mean however, we have to love every moment of being a parent. Allow yourself to be human.

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posted by Khate @ 6:41 AM   0 comments

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