| Friday, April 4, 2008 |
| What Happens When You Just Don't Feel Like Being A Parent Some Days? |
I had all the answers. I was well into my thirties when my first child was born and had been working with children, studying about childrearing practices, had many hours of babysitting behind me, and was more than ready to be a parent. When my first child was born I was instantly a mother of three. My husband's twin eight year old sons lived with us. As much as I embraced my role of mother and knew this is what I wanted, some days I just wanted to scream "I don't want to be a parent today!!"
Parenting is a demanding and all encompassing job. It is an around the clock job. There is little recognition or status attached to it. You're constantly having to think of the needs of others and the older your children get, you find yourself having to negotiate and problem solve almost daily. It can be draining. You're also asked to listen to things that are mundane and boring but nevertheless important to your child.
What do you do on those days you'd rather be sitting on the beach with a margarita in your hand than going over a spelling list for the tenth time, or listening to a child who can't seem to stop whining or reading a story you've already read fifty times? You allow yourself to feel what you feel. You're human and all of us feel that way sometimes. It definitely doesn't mean you're not meant to be a parent or that you're a bad parent.
We owe it to our children to be aware of our true feelings and acknowledge them. If you find yourself frequently thinking that you don't feel like being a parent, it's probably time to schedule an adult oriented activity with your partner or friends. Don't be afraid to say out loud how you're feeling. Chances are if you're speaking with another parent, they've often felt the same way and are relieved someone else feels the same. You don't want to tell your child that you don't feel like being a parent but you can say something like: "Mommy just feels like a rest today" or "I need a time out right now."
Children are a blessing and those of us who are parents know that. We can't imagine life without them. We often didn't know what love was until we had children. It doesn't mean however, we have to love every moment of being a parent. Allow yourself to be human.
Article SourceLabels: Parenting
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posted by Khate @ 6:41 AM   |
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